IS THIS YOU?!
If so, consider taking some pressure off via Core Energetics. And check out my new articleA Look At Core Energetics and other Somatic Therapy Approaches that, while comparing Core with other somatic approaches, also explains how our work frees us from our our old unwanted reactions. After working through the long held tension from our lower self it is much easier to be in the present, to say what we want and what we don't want with grace. It impacts our tendencies toward judgement and reaction patterns and affords us more pleasure in life. Read it here: http://www.bodypsychotherapyschool.com/new-blog//a-look-at-core-energetics-and-other-somatic-therapy-approaches